A fun way to sample new books and find new writers! Here’s the link to the Weekend Writing Warriors central page, so you can visit all the participants sharing excerpts today…
Per the popular vote last week, switching to excerpts from my soon-to-be published science fiction romance WIP, Mission to Mahjundar…
Although she’d never lived in the temperate mountain forests, Princess Shalira imagined she’d prefer them to the hot lowlands. Whenever she visited the tiny temple of her patron goddess Pavmiraia on the outskirts of the city, as she was doing 
today, she pretended the heat and intrigues of the capital and the court had been left behind. This chapel and her vivid daydreams had provided special refuges for most of her life.
The floor was cool beneath her bare feet as she strolled twenty paces from the door to the altar, passing the snoring priestess, sprawled on a bench no doubt, mouth probably wide open. Not many come here anymore, not many at all. Will anyone worship the goddess when I’ve gone? Tears pricked Shalira’s eyes as she felt for the padded knee rest, bowed her head, and knelt in front of the altar.
“Do you know this is to be my last visit?” she whispered to the goddess she could no longer see, “Do you care?
The story:
An attempted assassination left Princess Shalira blind as a child and, now that she’s of marriageable age, her prospects are not good because of her disability. She’s resigned herself to an arranged marriage rather than face life under the thumb of her cold stepmother. But then she meets Mike Varone, a Sectors Special Forces officer sent to Mahjundar by the intergalactic government to retrieve a ship lost in her planet’s mountains. After Mike saves Shalira from another assassination attempt, she arranges for him to escort her across the planet to her future husband. She’s already falling hard for the deadly offworlder and knows she should deny herself the temptation he represents, but taking Mike along to protect her is the only way she’ll live long enough to escape her ruthless stepmother.
Mike, for his part, resists his growing attraction to the princess; he has a mission on this planet and rescuing the vulnerable but brave princess isn’t it. No matter how much he wishes it could be.
But what should have been an easy trek through Mahjundar’s peaceful lands swiftly turns into an ambush with danger around every turn. Shalira’s marriage begins to seem less like an arranged union and more like yet another planned assassination. The more they work together to survive, the harder it becomes to stop themselves from falling in love. Caught in a race against time, can they escape the hostile forces hunting them and make it off the planet?
Can there be a future for a simple soldier and an intergalactic princess?
(Still working on the blurb…)
As always, I love your comments and feedback.
EXCITING NEWS! My award winning SFR Escape From Zulaire is in a boxed set, released last Friday! It’s available now at the major ebook retailers at a ridiculously low price of $.99…I used to excerpt it here and on Six Sentence Sunday in the old days…
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I’ll be interested in how you write from the POV of a blind person.
Nice excerpt (and intriguing blurb). Really vivid descriptions. Writing from the pov of a vision challenged person is tricky so I’m looking forward to more. 🙂
Nice excerpt, vivid and moving. Can’t wait to see more of this one, Veronica! =D
Got me interested 🙂 Really curious how Shalira adapted to becoming blind; was she resentful at first? I always think about characters’ back stories once I get interested in their present. Your characters are always so relatable.
Great snippet overall. “The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between a firefly and a lightning bolt.” With that said, “Tears pricked” does not work for me. I like the description of the cool floor beneath her feet.
http://joycelansky.blogspot.com
I’m sure the goddess will miss her visits. Lovely descriptions.
Hum, I hope the Goddess will care and be nice about it, she will need strength on her journey.
So moving, I almost cried. Love the feet padding on the cool tiles.
Great worldbuilding. Already have a sense of place:)
Congratulations on the box set. Intriguing opening and great story concept. I am hooked;).
wow, I love how you “showed” that she couldn’t with your descriptions rather than telling us
wow, I love how you “showed” that she couldn’t see with your descriptions rather than telling us
Thanks for the supportive comments! My best friend in college was blind and she was the most amazing woman, taught me a lot about not accepting limits and living life to the fullest at all times.If not for her, I wouldn’t have been able to write Princess Shalira. Seems so odd not to be sharing Egypt with the Weekend Writing Warriors though! Which just tells me it was time to switch off to the SFR LOL.
20 paces and many other details make this snippet quite wonderful. What a fascinating character you’re bringing to life. Congrats on the box set too. Very cool!
I can’t wait to read more! As always you’ve drawn me into another world and you’ve painted a vivid picture of desolation for the princess. “Do you know this is to be my last visit?” she whispered to the goddess she could no longer see, “Do you care? Love it!
What an intriguing premise. I really like her so far. The blurb sounds wonderful and I can’t wait to read more of this one.
Every detail was spot on and her thoughts were quietly moving. At first I questioned why she couldn’t see the snoring priestess, then by the end had figured it out. Masterfully done! Oh, and .99 is ridiculous. I feel almost guilty, but not enough to stop from popping over there and getting it.
Don’t feel guilty, Alexis! We priced it as just about a giveaway so we hopefully could make some best seller lists and also to let readers easily sample a range of SFR, which is a good investment for all of us SFR authors 🙂 Thanks!
Congrats on the boxed set release, Veronica! Very interesting opening for this story. Love the way you’ve set the scene. Wonderful job!
Nice snippet. I can feel the refuge as if I was there, Veronica. And congratulations on your release of the boxed set! 😀
Nice last line…makes me wonder how the god will respond. Interesting that the MC is blind.
Darn it, Veronica! My reading list is already too long for my lifespan, and now I have to bump all those books down again, for another one of yours. 😀
I like it. It draws you in and makes you want to keep reading.
Intriguing snippet. Your blurb even more so.
Love the story line — excellent conflict.
I enjoyed this snippet and the blurb on the backstory.
You struck a cord for many readers who also wonder if the gods are listening.
Kudos!
So it begins… 🙂 I like how you infuse details into action and dialogue. Seamless. And it’s a good premise. It seems like you can borrow from your broad knowledge of Egyptian history to write this princess. And Congrats on the boxed set! Yay for you! 🙂
Yes, congrats on the boxed set. And this sounds like another great story!
Congratulations on your box set! and I can’t wait to read more. It already sounds like an epic story!
What a great introduction into the world and this character. Congrats on the boxed set! Can’t wait for more 🙂
When I teach writing workshops I always tell the participants to blindfold themselves and use their other senses to describe their surroundings – you’ve done such a magnificent job of this. That alone makes this snippet so captivating.
Congrats on the boxed set release!
Thank you so much for the compliment, Chelle! I really appreciate that. I’ve tried hard throughout the entire book to portray Shalira using her other senses, as my college friend did so effectively..
Ooh, your work-in-progress blurb sounds exciting!
Forgotten princess, forgotten goddess. Things are going to change!
Your snippet is just gorgeous. The prose paints such a beautiful picture and I’m immediately invested in this character. Congrats on the boxed set! Looking forward to reading more.
Veronica, this sounds so good! You paint a beautiful picture with your words. Just lovely!
Nice excerpt. Well written and with good detail (the snoring priestess), and makes me wonder why this might be her last visit. It hooks the reader well.
This is so amazing. Love it! So looking forward to more!!!
Nice snippet. I can relate to the female character–daydreaming is my escape mechanism too 🙂
Keep smiling,
Yawatta
I would have never guessed that the princess is blind from this excerpt – it’s a good thing that I read the blurb. The story sounds super interesting, especially with the added intergalactic twist. I’ve never really been a fan of sci-fi, but the descriptions in your excerpt reminded me of many fantasy stories I’ve read. I may be converted yet!
I love the emotion of this scene, and the image of the sleeping priestess. I don’t normally think of a priest or priestess as being asleep in the temple.