Here’s the link to the Weekend Writing Warriors central page, so you can visit all the participants sharing excerpts today…A fun way to sample new books and find new writers!
We’re onto a new story of mine, a WIP that still needs a lot of work. Mark, an ex-Special Forces soldier in the Sectors, has been hired by the Outlier Empress to rescue a kidnap victim who’s been taken to the border planet Freemarket, where anything goes and the authorities are usually hands off. Kind of like Las Vegas…he’s broken into the kidnapper’s house, persuaded Alessandra to go with him and now they’re fleeing in a stolen car, pursued by the bad guys (Kliin is the leader) and the planetary police…Mark is speaking:
“Local cops. Damn, I was hoping they’d stay out of this like they usually do. Kliin must have paid them one hell of a lot of money to be at his beck and call. We’re going to have to ditch the car and make a run for it.” He took his attention off the road for a moment, to assess how Alessandra was holding up.
She screamed a warning but even Mark’s reflexes weren’t fast enough to avoid a collision with the cargo hauler pulling into his lane. The groundcar rammed the side of the truck, the safety mechanisms deploying instantly and then retracting.
“Where the seven hells did you learn to drive, pal?” demanded the truck driver as he half fell from his vehicle.
There’s a lot of backstory between Mark, Kliin and Alessandra (not revealed in an info dump, I promise), a lot of adventures to come for Mark and ‘Sandy’…I might try to get this finished in 2015. I’ll probably do a few weeks of excerpts from this scene, see what you all think…
As an aside, I mention the Outlier empire and its Empress in passing in my other books, so I thought it’d be fun to bring a bit of that other galactic civilization into the mix.
Nicely written — motion, tension, crackling dialogue. Damn truck drivers! ;D
Exciting beginning with kind of a cliffhanger end to it. Eager to learn more . Happy healthy New Year, my friend.
He learned to drive in a place where the laws of physics have opinions about merging two vehicles into the same space at the same time. 😀
Just what they need during a chase scene, and just what I needed this morning. Thanks, Veronica! 🙂
I like the world building going on! “ground car” and “cargo hauler” fill me with intrigue! I can hardly wait to read this one. 🙂
Fun snippet. I love the hints of your worldbuilding that come through and look forward to more.
Time to hotfoot it out of there before the cops arrive.
I love being thrown into the action and the world this way. You immediately capture my attention and imagination. Fun snippet!
I liked that question at the end (where the seven hells…). It shows he’s got his own authentic voice. Great snippet, I don’t have a snippet on my site today.
I love characters who are bad drivers. They’re fun to read and write, even if they’re doing some very dangerous things.
This is action-packed right off the bat! Love it! So excited to read a new story from you, Veronica!
Throwing this complication into a chase scene really heightens the tension. Great snippet.
Tightly scripted with lots of tension and world building. I’m looking forward to more. Happy New Year!
Like out of an action movie! Great eight!
oooh, very tense, and I’m intrigued by the name Alessandra — Italian spelling, I’m curious about the backstory. 🙂
Frikken truck drivers! I’m picturing a gritty sci-fi world, like something out of Tatooine, I like it. Nice snippet
Glad to see you’re not letting up on the action even though you’re on to a new story! Looks like an intriguing world- great snippet!
Plenty of action with a hint of other world building and a touch of humor. Love it.
Awesome! Great action here, and love the characterization through the dialogue 🙂 hope to see more!
Love the pace and action in this. I felt really tense reading it and it was only a few lines, so WOW, great writing!! I’m looking forward to more from this scene and this MS through 2015
Great action and Mark’s explanation flow well thanks to his distinct voice and your restraints in info dumping. Intriguing!
Oh no! Ha, I could totally visualize that though. Great action packed eight. Have a wonderful New Year!
Great imagery. I could picture the scene perfectly.
Hope you have a wonderful New Year!!
A very exciting snippet, and I’m looking forward to seeing more.
Thank you kindly for your comment at peppersfetch.blogspot.com
Great world building. Different, but familiar enough to draw us in. Have a fabulous New Year!
You’re very talented with setting. I can picture everything when I read your scenes, like I’m there. Looks like Mark has some explaining to do!
Keep smiling,
Yawatta
Exciting and intriguing snippet. Can’t wait to read more. By the way, I love the name Alessandra! It’s my sister’s name and I was the one that picked it out for her, hehe.