Travelers to Where? Weekend Writing Warriors

WeWriWa buttonHere’s the link to the Weekend Writing Warriors central page, so you can visit all the participants sharing excerpts today…A fun way to sample new books and find new writers!

We’re onto a new story of mine, a WIP that still needs a lot of work. Mark, an ex-Special Forces soldier in the Sectors, has been hired by the Outlier Empress to rescue a kidnap victim who’s been taken to the border planet Freemarket, where anything goes and the authorities are usually hands off. Kind of like Las Vegas…he’s broken into the house of  Barent Kliin, the kidnapper, persuaded Alessandra to go with him and fled in a stolen car, pursued by the bad guys and the planetary police. They collided with a cargo hauler…Mark knocked the driver out and assisted Alessandra from their wrecked vehicle, after which the couple flee into the crowded marketplace but are now trapped…until a strange little being showed up, offering to help…having no choice, Mark and Sandy flee with the creature and fall into a tent:

           Mark stood and reached to help Sandy regain her feet, relieving her of the heavy bag. She staggered as soon as she put her weight on the knee she’d twisted escaping the wrecked groundcar. 

          “Welcome,” said someone from deep in the recesses of the tent.

           Still supporting Sandy, trying to shield her from whoever was behind them, Mark turned.

            A veiled woman, dressed head to toe in shimmering lavender, was standing a few feet away, as if guarding the entrance to the second, larger room Mark glimpsed.

            “I’m sorry we’re intruding,” Sandy said breathlessly in between panting breaths. “The little – the sentient thought you could help us.”

            “The Nelafinari are never wrong in their assessment of travelers,” their hostess answered, putting a special emphasis on the last word.

Note from me: Life changing decisions to be made by Mark and Sandy shortly. We’ll keep going with the scene next week.


30 comments on “Travelers to Where? Weekend Writing Warriors

  1. Intriguing new character. She seems knowledgeable about your world and it sounds like she’d be a good ally. I’m pretty sure it won’t be that simple, though. 😉

  2. She was about to call the little furry critter something less tactful than “sentient,” I see. Lots of word choice emphasis here. I wonder what “traveler” means to that mysterious lady… and if they want that label.

  3. Nelafinari is a name with some dignity to it—so much better than “sentient”. 🙂

    And “travelers” . . . my imagination is racing around that one, Veronica. Can’t wait to read more!

  4. I like that the woman in lavender knows the name of the little creature who’s saving them. I’m also very intrigued by her emphasis on the word “travelers.” I hope they haven’t jumped out of the frying pan and into the fire.

  5. A shimmery lavender woman throwing out alien-sounding terms in a somewhat authoritative voice sounds like a barrelful of intrigue in the near-future. Fabulous bit!

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